Minnesota Winter Chili (Or, Conquering the Beast)

OK, full disclosure: The reason this chili is so good is because this is not my first attempt. The initial run did not go so well, as I threw the pot of chili (and my ego) out the door. And not just the chili. Pot, containing chili, out the door. We'll go over my mistakes (and there were many) in a few. 

First of all, the source of this recipe is the whole reason I've changed my diet in the first place. Ultramarathon legend Scott Jurek's 2012 book Eat & Run chronicles his running career and his slowly-but-surely transition to a vegan lifestyle. Do yourself a favor and read this book, even if you're not a runner, or even an athlete for that matter. READ IT. Anyway...

In addition to being really inspiring, Jurek is also nice enough to share a ton of great recipes, 76 percent of which are too complicated for my life right now. But this is chili! Ingredients, stove, pot, wooden spoon, ta da, right? 

In a word,

No. 

Here's the recipe in it's original form. Note that the prep is going to take a solid bit of time. Unless you have a slap-choppy-thing, in which case, awesome. Consider getting yourself one in general, saves a million minutes of your life. 

2 tablespoons coconut oil or olive oil
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup finely chopped onion
8–10 medium mushrooms, finely chopped
1/2 cup finely chopped green bell pepper
1/2 cup finely chopped red bell pepper
1/2 cup finely chopped carrots
1 jalapeño pepper or other hot pepper, seeded and minced (optional)
1 cup frozen corn kernels
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon ground coriander
2 tablespoons chili powder, or to taste
2 teaspoons sea salt, or to taste
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1 28-ounce can diced tomatoes
1 15-ounce can tomato purée
1 15-ounce can kidney beans, drained
1 15-ounce can black beans, drained
1 15-ounce can red beans, drained
2 1/2 cups water
1/2 cup dry bulgur wheat
Hot sauce or cayenne pepper (optional)
1/4 cup minced fresh cilantro, for garnish
Tofutti sour cream, for garnish (optional)

Yeah. That's a sh*tload. By the way, this serves 8. 

Once everything's prepped, it's relatively smooth sailing. Get yourself a large pot and heat the oil over medium heat. Add veggies, garlic and spices and stir around for about 10 minutes. If stuff starts to stick, throw in a few teaspoons of water. 

Throw in the rest, minus the sour cream and cilantro. Bring to a simmer over medium-low heat, get yourself a good book, don't go anywhere and stir every few minutes for about a half hour. Hey, it worked for me. 

Uncover and simmer for another 20 minutes or so, stirring less frequently. 

Eat. Enjoy your life. Roll around in it. Get seconds. 

Now, here's where the finesse comes in. This is where I went so, so wrong the first time:

• I think it was a combination of buying cookware from IKEA and getting distracted by whatever was on TV, but Jesus Christ did I burn the hell out this chili. STIR IT. A LOT. This may not actually be necessary if you have nice things (and I do not), but I'm not taking the chance ever again. 
• I also didn't add enough water. When you make this, there's going to be a ton of liquid at first. It will reduce during the hour or so that it simmers, so don't think you know best by shorting yourself of liquid. Because I you don't.  
• I used dried red beans instead of canned. They floated to the top and turned into jawbreakers while everything else turned into a biohazard. Cool. 

This is what I did oh, so right this time.

• I freakin' stirred that sh*t. Kept both eyes on it. 
• I used canned pinto beans instead of dried red beans.
• I pretty much doubled up on all the spices, garlic included. I noticed that once I added the beans and tomato products the first time, the spice complexity died. Also, I didn't have and couldn't find coriander, but it didn't seem to matter. 
• I also dumped in a quarter cup-ish of Frank's Red Hot Sauce, but next time I make this I'll add the recipe amount of salt and Frank's instead of doubling up on the salt as well. If I have one criticism of this batch, it's a smidge salty. 

Even my meathead boyfriend likes this. Trust me, you won't miss the beef, and the bulgar wheat gives it a nice texture. I now have lunch for the next week, provided that no one else snakes it. 

You're welcome :)